Chapter One - Kirks Don't Cry

DENEVA 3

Peter was never more glad than when he woke up back in his bed. The nightmare about the Enterprise and his family's death was done. It had to have been a dream. His beloved Uncle Jim would never have thrown him off The Bridge. And if Peter asked, Uncle Jim would certainly let him live aboard The Enterprise, for that had been his real dream--to sail the stars at the side of his real father. Not that Sam Kirk was any slouch, but he, after all was dea----not the Captain Of The Enterprise.

Smiling, he smelled the roasting Thanksgiving meal. Life was good, and he would never complain about it again. Uncle Jim couldn't make it, but Peter didn't mind. In fact, it might be better if The Enterprise never arrived. Something bad might happen then.

"Hi, Mom!"

Aurelan seemed deucedly confused, as though Peter had said something odd.

"Hi, Peter. Should you be up right now? You were feeling pretty sick, kiddo."

"I'm fine. I'm gonna take Marc for a walk."

"Peter--don't go in there."

"Noper! Rise and shine, big guy! 'Pita' is here to---what are you doing?"

In Marc's room, a confused Sam Kirk was running an instrument that looked like a salt-shaker over little Marc's sleeping form.

"Peter--you didn't need to come in here. Jim has already provided positive ident--"

"I'm taking my little brother for a walk, Dad. He likes it when I do that."

Sam looked at Peter like he had three heads.

"Stay here, Peter. I have to call your Uncle Jim."

"Aboard The Enterprise?"

"Yes, we a-----Oh, My God. Just stay here, son. Don't go anywhere."

Sam left in a hurry. Peter waited, but then ran out of patience. He picked his little brother up, hugged him, and kissed him on the cheek.

"Oh, its the itsy-bitsy baby, the baby, the baby--whoa--Mom must have left you by an open window--ooh, you're so cold. Gonna wrap you up--there! Oh, such a good boy. Why some people complain about having a little brother--I never will."

Holding the sleeping infant in a sheet blanket, Peter made for the
door, a proud, beaming Big Brother.

"Uncle Jim can't come, Marc. He's our daddy too, ya know? Cause our first daddy had some kind of accident. So we get to have two, and its not like steps, either. But Uncle Jim won't arrive until after all of you are---he'll never arrive."

But as Peter began his walk, he began to hear screams. In the skies over Deneva appeared three gigantic mouths, with seemingly infinite rows of teeth. They descended, and proceeded to devour the landscape as they did. All ran before it -- Except Peter Kirk.

"Be brave, Marc--Kirks don't cry. I have just one word for you, Tricephalos! ENTERPRISE!!"

With the utterance of the magic word, young Peter transformed into the full adult form of -- Captain Kirk! Sworn enemy of the evil Tricephalos.

"C'mon, Marc! It--looks--a--lot—like Someone--needs--a--good--orthodontist!"

Leaping up, the mustard-tunicked hero unleashed a barrage of Phaser Vision at the hideous monster.

"Hmm--no effect. Let's try a---Tractor Beam!"

Amazingly, the infant in Peter's arms never stirred, even once.

"Fascinating. It - would - seem - that - motion - affects - the - creature. But - how- do I beat it? I need--Vulcan Girl."

As the creature came at him, Peter began to shake, and reverted to normal.

"What's going on? What is this crap? I--no--I--Must-Believe!"

Resuming the form of Captain Kirk, Peter flew directly at the three mouths, and when they clamped down upon him all at once, those mighty teeth broke. The evil creature, Tricephalos, had fallen in battle and was no more.

"Just-call-me-The-Rock!"

An entire world sang the accolades of the young hero. He was exultant, and his family proud. The UFP President presented him with a medal. Peter found it odd that this man rode in an ancient wheelchair, but he was the picture of strength earned through adversity, so it was all right. He even got to meet a real King, a tall dark man named Martin of Atlantis.

"Hate, my young friend. It is Hate that you face down. Conquer it—and be Free At Last."

Peter bowed before The Great Man.

"I Will, Your Majesty."

Something was wrong, and Peter knew it. But life was good again--again?--hadn't life always been like this? Like the time he liberated Khan's Death-Camps? Forced The Klingons and Romulans to hold fair and free elections? Granted, it wasn't all fun and games. Sometimes, the burdens of being a cosmic hero made him feel like he was going to crack wide open. He also wondered why he was still holding Marc--and why the baby was still sleeping. Then---reality began to shift in horrid ways.

USS ENTERPRISE

In her quarters, Lieutenant Nyota Uhura continued talking with Brianna Kirk.

"I'm sorry for everything, Bri. I wish Jim would take it as well as you have."

"Oh, Princess. Who says I'm taking it well? But I went through my denial with George. I'll miss my boy--but I'll miss my girl, as well. Did you know that Aurelan lived with us two years before she and Sam became engaged? After her mother's suicide, I just couldn't let a well-meaning dolt like Tom Sorel wreck that little girl's head any further. She and Sam were obvious. But she loved Jim, too. When she couldn't crack that eternal stone-face of his--she'd flash him! Such a free spirit. My only true regret is never meeting Little Marc. Has—Jim heard from Carol?"

Uhura sighed.

"Barely. She won't take most of his calls, assuming its merely a custody 'ploy'."

Onscreen, Brianna shook her head.

"Carol never understood. Sometimes the old standby fails."

"What Old Standby?"

"Princess---you can't be that naive. Or--Jim doesn't know?"

Nyota got a sick flash of intuition.

"Bri---No! I may not be Carol's biggest booster, but for you to say that--its scurrilous!"

Bri folded her arms.

"Young lady, do you remember what your full nickname is with me?"

Nyota chuckled.

"It was after the Tarsus Four Massacre. Jim and I had just fought off Kodos, and off we went together. You found us, peeled Jim off, and declared me, 'Princess Hump'. You and Jim were also upset that I hadn't told him I was--a trifle underaged."

"You were thirteen, to be precise. But you two still used precautions. Two anxious teenagers, and you thought ahead. But Carol Marcus, a scientist in her twenties, couldn't remember to. Then, she basically demands that Jim take a desk job. Her ace in the hole--a bun in the oven. I like Carol--not as much as I like you--but she was furious that her trick didn't work. No wonder she won't let Jim see David."

"That--is speculation."

"That, Princess--is the word from her mother."

Uhura was stunned, but wondered why she was. Carol, though a good person, was a past master at using some trick to end debate on a subject. Always had been. But Jim was the one she couldn't trick—and never would.

"How is Peter's room coming along?"

"Oh, fine. But I still think Peter should be with Jim. How is it that a social club like Admiralty Hall can dictate policy to a Captain in the field? They have no legal authority to deny anything to anyone."

"Tell me about it. They're little more than a group of xenophobes that have it in for Jim. They say he's not pro-Earth, or pro-human enough."

"Pro-Human? This is The United Federation Of Planets, isn't it? Shouldn't they be called on the carpet for favoring Earth over the rest of the UFP? George always told me that place would be trouble. But all those bigots became Admirals, and my husband was an absentee father. I think I understand him a little better now--he had to stay in StarFleet, to oppose a great and growing evil. I just wish Peter could have met him."

"Bri--I have to go on duty. I'll try and get Jim to call you soon."

"Thanks, Princess. Withhold your favors if you have to!"

Uhura shut off the screen.

"First, Bri--he has to seek my favors. Its been three weeks, now."

Up on The Bridge, Uhura noted the lack of personnel, owing to the continuing Crisis on Deneva. It was just her and The Captain. She walked up behind him, and kissed him on his neck. He started, and looked almost angry at her.

"Resume your post, Lieutenant."

"Aye, Captain. May I ask the status of the people on Deneva?"

Kirk shrugged.

"Well, I think you would no that if you were up here instead of snitching on me to my mother, every chance you get. Stay out of my personal life, Uhura. That's first and final to you."

"Does that ban include The Captain's Quarters?"

"Maybe it should. A relationship like this has inherent dangers."

Uhura was not having any of it.

"Like my getting pregnant on purpose, and then refusing to let you near the child as a kind of sick bargaining chip?"

"Say what you have to."

"Alright, I will. I never liked Gary Mitchell. Even before 'godhood', he was stuck-up, overqualified, and a manipulative schemer. He sent Carol to meet you, in the first place."

"I know that. He told me--after he changed."

"He didn't change. He just became more like himself. But did he tell you why he introduced you to Carol?"

"He--thought we'd hit it off."

"Why? She was more like him than you. No, Gary didn't think you'd end up together, didn't think you'd hit it off. No--he wanted to hit—on me!"

This side of his late friend had always infuriated Kirk, but he turned that fury on Uhura.

"Nyota, does all this soap have a point?"

"Yes, it does. We go through these periods. I understand, and can wait for your decision, because we are worth it. But Jim, your method of not dealing with things until you have to is hurting me--and its killing Peter. Talk to him please. The boy has lost everyone. Except Brianna--and you."

Kirk looked lost.

"Nyota, I don't know how to talk to him. Sam, Aurelan, Marc--all in one fell swoop. No, he's strong. He's the strongest---"

"McCoy to Kirk! Get down here, Jim--Its Peter! Its an emergency!"

"Bones, can it wait?"

"NO, IT SURE AS PURPLE HADES CANNOT WAIT! GET DOWN HERE, CAPTAIN! I'll call a psych hearing if you don't. I've already sent Spock up to replace you. Hurry, Dammit!"

Kirk got up.

"Nyota--come with me. If something has happened to my boy---I'll need you. I need you--even if something hasn't."

"Jim?"

"Yes?"

"This is why I wait for you.

Not hand in hand, but certainly side-by-side, the two went down to the Sickbay Deck. What they saw frightened them.

"Jim--Thank God. He's ready to shake apart."

The three looked, and saw Peter, eyes red with tears, holding a small blanket. In it--was the dead body of his infant brother.

"Keep away, Uncle Jim. Somehow, the transport aboard Enterprise killed Marc. But, if we beam back down, I can transform and restore him to life. Then maybe Mom and Dad, too."

"Hello, Peter."

"Hello, Lieutenant Uhura. Keep back."

"I will. Call me Nyota."

Jim attempted to lurch forward, but Peter pulled out a tube that his tired mind saw as a phaser.

"Unc--please. I know how to use this. Just beam me back down. I can't stay here anyway. They said so."

"Peter--Deneva is under quarantine. You have to go to Earth--live with Grandma."

Uhura looked at the small, still form of Marc Kirk.

"He's beautiful, Peter. You must have loved him a lot."

"I still love him, because he's my baby brother. Its my job to protect him. I just have to be brave. I can bring him back, then find Tri---then find out what caused this--you are so beautiful, Nyota."

"Peter, your arms look tired. Can I hold him for you?"

"He's not heavy. I can hold him."

"Just--here!"

Uhura grabbed the tube.

"Peter, this isn't a phaser. It doesn't even look like one. Can you be brave without it?"

"Of course I can. I----failed him, Nyota. Marc is gone. My little brother is----"

As Peter began to shake further, McCoy whisked the body back to the morgue area.

"No! Bring Him Back! Don't take my baby away! I helped take care of him--I was there when he arrived. Marc--please don't go. Your big brother needs you. I---I'm not going to cry--Kirks don't---"

He started sobbing, and cried into Uhura's shoulder. She held him, and spoke words of comfort. Carefully handing the boy off to Jim, she stayed and watched the heart-wrenching scene. Jim spoke words that were meant as much for himself as for the boy. Harsh words, but words that were, in the end, quite necessary in a harsh reality where the good guys didn't always win.

"Your Brother Is Dead."

Chapter Two -  Defense Mode

"What do you want me to say?"

The flippant, off-putting manner of the eleven-year old boy when offered help confirmed for McCoy what Jim already had : Peter was The Captain's Son.

"I 'want' you to say whatever's on your mind, and show some respect to this ship's Chief Medical Officer. Balance the two however you see fit."

The mannerisms were as eerie as the boy's appearance. Though lanky, and with trademark Romulan dark hair from his mother's side--it was as though someone had cloned Jim just in case the real one went missing. Which, when Leonard thought about it, might not be a bad idea, given Kirk's recklessness.

"You want what's on my mind, Doctor? Fine. I Want My Life Back."

Bluntness was not a quality lacking in the Kirk family. Then again, The Doctor was fairly certain his own family had invented the attribute while holding a 'revenooer' at rifle-point. For the moment, he gave as good as he got.

"I'm CMO. You want miracles, speak to Scotty. You want help dealing with crippling mental anguish, you talk to me."

Again, the parallels were evocative of time and reality travel. Peter's face was a fountain of mounting defiance. He would be dragged into the light, kicking and screaming, punching and gouging--if even then.

"Why Am I Here, Doctor?"

McCoy was fighting a losing battle to maintain his objectivity. Something about the boy caused people to react as though they were speaking to his father. In other words, he was being a little pain in the ass to Leonard McCoy. He flipped his padd-sheet one page, and read from it.

"Why? Young Master Kirk wants to know why he's here? Alright. I Quote : "Subject has recently endured war-trauma. This resulted from having to kill former classmates in the defense of his own life, utilizing a phaser he claims was in someone's personal collection. Further, this subject has endured the death of his entire immediate family, including an infant brother whose care and feeding he was often charged with. Subject exhibited extreme anger and obvious rage when informed that Starfleet would not allow him to live aboard The Enterprise. Subsequently, subject suffered a complete nervous breakdown, withdrawing into a delusional world in which he was a hero, fighting a monster called Tricephalos. Subject stole infant brother's body, believing it could be restored to life. Should I go on?"

But when he saw the boy hanging his head, his face the mask of a lost soul, Leonard remembered at last. Peter was not his father. The arrogance gone, the boy spoke. His eyes were those of one who had beheld The Devil itself.

"Doctor--they all died because of me. Tricephalos sent out his spore to find me. Those were his cells that killed everyone or made them insane. He's the Beast Of Revelations, and he wants me!"

McCoy smiled inwardly, for even this delusion was better than complete withdrawal.

"Big' Un, is he?"

"A megameter, all around."

"Oh, I imagine he's much bigger than that."

"What?"

"Well, if those things were just castoff cells, the monster itself must be the size of several star systems. Kind of makes you wonder why no one's found him yet."

Peter's features softened.

"Er--he can change shape?"

"Maybe. Or maybe you can change your own shape--to one capable of dealing with all this."

Again, Peter was blunt.

"I Need That, Too, Doc."

Sensing an opening, Doctor McCoy went for broke. "Peter, you know that this Tricephalos isn't real, don't you?"

Peter Kirk sat and thought about telling McCoy the truth as he knew it. But nothing good could come of that, so he let it go, and said what his makeshift therapist wanted to hear.

"Yes, Doctor. But it helped to see The Enemy as something I could hurt back. I'm sorry I worried everyone. I know we'll have more of these sessions...."

"And we're having more of this one. Sit down, young man."

In another inherited gesture, Peter turned around, slammed down his fist, and his features became like wrought iron.

"Why?! Why, Doctor? When we get done here, I'm sure you'll feel a whole lot better. But my Dad, my Mom, and my little heart will still be DEAD! Yes, I went nuts! What would you do if your parents were taken for no cause you could understand? What if the baby you held in your arms and took care of since he was born had to be pulled out of your arms? You think my parents took care of him? They were good people, but there was a reason Grandma visited so much when I was a baby! Mom nearly suffered a genetic crash while carrying Marc. Guess who had his DNA extracted to supplement? Do you understand my connection to that angel?"

McCoy, now quite a bit less officious, nodded silently. He had been wondering why a boy unconscious for days showed multiple signs of advanced exhaustion. Sam had been an oddball horticulturist, and Aurelan something of a mystic. But this burdening of their eldest son probably lay more in Peter than their careers. Like Jim, it was probably not in him to complain-- particularly when he had someone to care for. Leonard saw the boy sit down suddenly.

"Peter? Are you all right?"

"I-I just need my supplements."

"What supplements? I have your medical records, and they listed nothing."

Peter thought about it, but seemed dazed.

"Well, Copper, for one. I have a Copper deficiency."

A thought sparked in The Doctor's mind.

"Peter--I may know of a -rare- procedure that can cure that deficiency. But what is the other supplement?"

"Why? Is Anything Wrong?"

"No. Just the curiosity of an Old Country Doctor."

Peter assented.

"Triflouperazine."

A blood test would later confirm McCoy's hypothesis. For now, though, he put his hand on Peter's shoulder, and spoke in comforting tones.

"Kid--you are one tough number, just like your Uncle. But that toughness can only carry you so far. Talk to Jim. He loves you, and needs you--just like Marc did. Remember, he lost his older brother, too. And he thought of your Mom like a sister. We've all faced moments like this. I myself---"

Peter interrupted.

"Doctor, it wasn't your fault. You couldn't have known."

"What wasn't my fault? And you shouldn't interrupt."

"What you just said about your Father."

"Er--I--what did I say, Peter?"

"You started cursing about how, a month after you took your Father off life support, they found a cure for his condition. But you couldn't have known in advance--any more than I could have known about the spores. Is that what you were trying to tell me? That it's okay to feel bad, but not guilty?"

Totally unnerved, McCoy manufactured a smile.

"Smart boy. Now, have a turkey sandwich, and get some sleep, alright?"

"Yes, Doctor."

"Peter?"

"Yes?"

"How about Len?"

"Alright--Uncle Len."

A tiny bit of his burden lifted, Peter left for food and rest. But McCoy's burden increased tenold.

"McCoy to Bridge."

"Is he alright, Bones?"

"Jim---You better get down here. Bring Spock."

In this matter, Captain Kirk showed no hesitancy. He and Spock were there within five minutes. First, 'Uncle Len' spoke of Peter's silent burden. Jim was shocked, but not surprised.

"Poor kid. Not long after he was born, my Mom had to move to Deneva. Sam and Aurelan--enjoyed each other's company. This wasn't classic neglect. They just needed reminders of their responsibility at times. Like we all do. Like I do. I'm going to challenge The Hall. He's staying here."

Spock questioned this choice.

"Captain, the hostage potential of so vulnerable a resident is enormous."

"If the Klingons contemplate taking my boy, I'll aim where it counts. I made a promise to Sam. I intend to keep it."

With that settled, McCoy relayed his next bombshell.

"Captain, Commander--Peter suffered from a pronounced Copper deficiency - which I cured via an amino realignment patch I surreptitiously placed on his shoulder. Its a common procedure--but he was never offered it. Also--he read my thoughts upon physical contact. Spock, will you view my findings?"

Spock nodded, and indeed looked the tests over.

"Hastily done, but essentially correct, Doctor. Indeed--it is fascinating."

"Gentlemen--since this concerns my flesh and blood, I'd like to maybe know what you know."

"Sorry, Jim. Its just all so hard to believe."

"Bones---"

"Alright. Here goes."

McCoy breathed in.

"Jim--That Boy Is A Romulan."

Chapter Three - Call My Mother Freedom

KENYA, 2250

"Upenda, darling. Would you like your grandmother to tell you a story?"

"Grandmother, I'm fourteen."

Upenda Nyota Uhura dearly loved her mother's mother, but she still treated her like a child.

"Ah, I see. My Upenda is old enough to take a lover, but too old for a good story."

"Oh, God. Father told you?"

"Oh, more like he yelled it. Was this Jimmy Kirk worth raising your father's blood pressure? Not that I mind seeing that, ya know."

The girl giggled, as she did each time she thought of her hero on Tarsus Four.

"Grandmother, he was like a warrior of the old stories--I had to be his first, or have him as mine--but I got both."

"The old stories, ya say?"

Nyota, as she preferred to be called, conceded.

"Alright--tell away."

"Oh, many thanks for the charity, 'Princess Hump'."

Nyota gulped. Her grandmother smiled.

"That Brianna Kirk, she thinks you have guts. She called me, and say you should come back when you're of age. Her Jimmy likes what happened, too."

"But Grandmother, he hates me. Wants to kill me for not telling him how old--or how young I am."

"PHeh! To me, that is all but a declaration of engagement. When he said that, the wedding became inevitable."

Nyota grinned, happy in this moment.

"Please tell your story, Grandmother. I always love them."

"Alright, I will."

The great woman gestured broadly.

"Once, There Was A Great And Hungry Snake. He Was Called The Violator Of The First Places. He Ate Whatever He Liked, And He Liked Everything. He Liked Eating So Much, He Grew Two Extra Heads Just So He Could Take In More. Now, When He Came To The First Places, There Was A Ruckus. Old Shellback, He Flew Out, To Tell Him No. Old Rainbow- Wing, She Also Flew Out To Tell Him No. Her Sister, The Great Batira, Or Darkwings, Went With Them To Tell The Snake No."

Now, Nyota was hooked.

"Did they stop the snake?"

"Well, That Snake, He Was So Hungry And Angry, He Ate The Hearts Of Old Shellback, Rainbow-Wing, And Darkwings. They Fought Him Anyway, But Fighting Without Your Heart, That's Bad. With Them Dead, He Came To A Great Valley. There, Ape-Fish Fought Him, Though To No Avail. Ape-Fish Was Eaten, Too. That Snake Rejoiced, For Ape-Fish Was The Only One Who Could Ever Stop Him. But The Snake Was Stupid, And Ape- Fish Hid A Sickly Whelp From Him. When That Snake Tried To Eat The Whelp, Ape-Fish Said, 'That Is Not My Whelp, Snake. That Is Only The Rock, And Snakes Do Not Eat Rocks.' "

The story had an eerie timeless quality about it to Nyota, like stories that retold real historical events.

"The Snake Said, 'I Do Not Eat Rocks, For Though I Gnash Stars Between My Teeth, Surely I Would Find That Upon That Rock Shall My Mighty Teeth Break. Toothless, I Could Even Be Slain. But I Will Mark That Rock, That I May Know It, When I Come Back For More Food.' "

"What became of the whelp?"

"Oh, That Whelp Was Plenty Smart. He Knew The Snake Was Chaos, So He Married Him A Daughter Of Order, And Humans Are All Of Their Line. The Snake Will Return, And So Will The Whelp, Bearing The Name Of The Rock. But The Snake Will Strike First, Leaving Its Mark. When That Day Should Come, Only One May Persuade The Rock To Live And Break The Snake's Teeth."

"Who, Grandmother?"

"Why, Freedom Of Course. The Rock Will Have Lost Much. Only Freedom Can Help Him Then--By Being Free No Longer. That Snake Has Brothers And Sisters, Whom He Keeps For Extra Food, But Still The Fools Love Him, For He Is Hate, Too. When They Strike The Rock, Only The Memory Of Good Things Like Freedom Will Keep Him Alive. Then, The Rock Will Find The Rock, And Find That They Are Both Children Of Mighty Kings Who Ride In A Great Angel. Together, They Will Slay The Great Snake, Whose Secret Name Is G'dra!"

And when the story was done, Nyota awakened aboard The Starship Enterprise, many years after the loss of her beloved grandmother. She was charged with a clarity of purpose that excluded details but was heavy on perspective. She dressed, and walked to the guest quarters where Peter Kirk stayed while aboard the ship.

"Come in."

Nyota saw Peter hurriedly turn off his computer station, and assumed that the boy was embarrassed to reveal that he had been looking at sexvids of some kind. But she wasn't there to regulate that.

"Can I help you, Nyota?"

She took both his hands in hers.

"Yes, Peter. I need a favor of you."

"Anything. You Know That."

With a gentle look on her face, she spoke some words that frankly blew his pain-wracked mind.

"Peter Kirk---I'd like for you--to become My Son."

The boy spoke no words--because there were no words.

Finally, though, words and questions formed in Peter's flabbergasted mind. Slowly, he gave halting voice to these questions.

"Lieutenant Uhura---you want me to become your son?"

"If you want that as well, Peter."

In reality, what Peter Kirk wanted was Uhura. But he had rapidly caught on that she and his Uncle Jim had an undeclared relationship. Til he found this out, Peter had never before hated his biological father for any reason.

But while the hate and jealousy had quickly passed, the lusts and daydreams of a boy in puberty would never quite fade. For Nyota Uhura was truly beautiful, and on many levels. To Peter, she was the ideal woman.

Now, though, this ideal woman was asking him to accept a condition that would forever put her out of reach, even of the sketchiest pipe-dream. Somehow, though---the request felt right.

"What about Aurelan?"

"Aurelan is dead, Peter."

Peter wanted to be angry at this casual statement of harsh fact. But her straight, matter-of-fact delivery reminded him of something--of someone.

"Will you adopt me?"

"Not legally. What we will exchange here--exceeds mere laws. It will be less of a legal fact than a statement of the way things are between us. Now, you must object. Raise all the objections you want. I must defeat them. For if I don't, this can not take place. Are you ready, Peter?"

"Yes, I'm ready."

But inside, Peter's words felt hollow. No stepparent could ever equal Sam and Aurelan.

In this, he found his first objection.......

Peter raised that first objection.

"Though they are dead, Sam and Aurelan were my parents. They did a good job, and taking a new parent so soon after losing them insults their memory."

Uhura was at the ready, though.

"Sam and Aurelan were good, loving people. But their irresponsible tendencies drove you crazy, Peter. Your grandmother had to live with you almost, until you were three. Then, Peter, who took over the housework?"

A little weary at the thought of all his former chores, Peter nodded.

"I did. Grandma Bri taught me how to do all that, because she said my folks wouldn't."

Nyota continued.

"Who took care of your baby brother, after he was born?"

Peter's eyes bulged.

"After?! Try before, and during. Have you ever argued with a holistic nut like my Mom, to get her to take the prescribed supplements? Its no fun. Then she nearly miscarried. They put so much of my DNA into Marc 'In Utero' he was almost more mine than theirs."

Uhura was a little angry at her old friends, but conversely found she missed them all the more. Aurelan's voice had been so weak, during that last distress call, Nyota barely recognized in it the fun - loving girl who had walked in on her and 'Jimmy' on Tarsus Four.

"So did your schoolwork suffer, as a result of these extra duties?"

"Once or twice. I always caught hell for it. But I was never punished. I mean, what were they going to do, give me extra chores?"

Peter's anger was beginning to overtake him. Uhura knew this was both a good and a dangerous thing, especially if the boy should turn on her.

"Sounds almost like you were in lockdown. Did the other children act understanding about how this deprived you of a social life?"

Peter seemed almost puzzled by this question.

"Of course they understood. Nyota, my situation was far from unique. On an advanced colony world, 'Parents Play - Children Pay'. We weren't treated badly. But it was generally assumed that whatever automation didn't take care of-- we would. The parents weren't so hard to deal with, though. It was the enforcer regime."

Uhura knew that 'enforcer regime' simply meant the battery of mental and physical tests that all colony children had to endure for safety's sake. But some places carried the practice quite far, Deneva 3 included. Genital scans for signs of sexual activity were not unheard of. The problem was, once some parents learned that current technology permitted them to control their kids' behavior, the temptation to use that technology was next to irresistible. The Enterprise crew had actually brokered peace in a children's revolt on, of all places, Tarsus Four.

"Peter, I have defeated your objection, using your own words. Aurelan and Sam were far from perfect parents, and your need for one is made greater by their lack of skills in that area. You show them no disrespect in seeking out that which you need--Me."

"Nyota--they weren't bad people. I loved them. I still do. I enjoyed taking care of Marc—most times."

Seeing Peter fighting back tears was more painful than most anything she had ever witnessed.

"But you know--I got so damned tired. They didn't understand---I'm not a mule. I just wanted them all to go away."

The boy lost the fight with his tears.

"And then they did. And now they're never coming back! Not ever! Because I wis--. Hiii--Dint--Wont-Tem-Tew-Diiiiiii---"

"Shhhh--Baby, It'll be alright. I promise."

Uhura grabbed his head, and though his face was buried in a theoretically embarrassing place, she could tell his thoughts were not of sex. Pulling him off and holding his face in her hands, Nyota wiped his tears away and kissed his forehead, and then his right cheek. She mussed his hair until he smiled.

"Guess--I sound like a whiner, blaming my folks for everything, huh?"

Nyota honked his nose.

"Little Mister--I and I alone will damned well tell you when you've been whining. Your problem is, you are too strong, Peter. Most parents know when to stop, because their child will complain. But I'll bet you never did."

"Uncle Jim wouldn't have."

Which seemed to be all the further answer either of them needed.

"Peter--raise your next objection."

The boy was not crying anymore, but looked away as he said what he had to next.

"Nyota--I'm a murderer."

Uhura nodded.

"I understand, Peter. But killing in self-defense does not make you a murderer. Your classmates had all lost their minds. One of them even stabbed you in the shoulder. No one who was that badly possessed survived the destruction of the spores."

Peter absently rubbed his shoulder.

"Meet Me, At Midnight, Mary."

Uhura puzzled at this.

"A Song?"

Peter stopped his pacing, and sat down.

"Obscure, even by my Dad's standards. It was probably obscure when it was new. But it was on a public domain database, and the title intrigued me."

Uhura felt relieved that Peter was now giving her real openings to work with.

"May I Ask Why?"

"Basically, because there was a girl named Mary who I used to meet at midnight. She was a friend."

"Did you love her?"

Peter looked ashamedly at Nyota.

"No. I didn't even know her last name. She had the twins, and I had Marc. We 'kids with kids' used to meet in the play maze. We all knew our way through it, and we could keep an eye on the kid-kids as they played and slept."

Now Uhura felt disturbed.

"At that time of night? Did your parents all know?"

Peter seemed to be recalling this  fondly, despite how overworked he had felt at the time.

"They knew what they wanted to. Babies cry a lot between Midnight and 6AM. If those babies were in a sound-dampened square, far from the residences, what did they care? They got to sleep."

Unthinkingly, Uhura almost shredded her gains with Peter in the space of a few words.

"You're Lying! You Have To Be Lying! Peter---what you're describing sounds close to chattel slavery. I refuse to believe it could have been that way. Aurelan and Sam were my friends."

The boy did not rage, as one might expect. Instead, Nyota saw a Spock-like calm fall over him.

"Computer."

"Working."

"Guest authorization."

"Acknowledged."

"File summary : Bureau Of Youth, Colonial Division, Field Report On Deneva Three."

"Accessing."

Peter shot Uhura a look of betrayal and fury as the computer pulled up the results. Nyota now realized how foolish her short argument was. She had actually said that, just because a story sounded outlandish and involved people she knew, it could not possibly be true. The report came up on the terminal, and Peter bade her read it.

"In Summary, The Adults Of Deneva Three Have It Good. So Good, That They Have Failed To Recognize The Burden This Good Life Has On Their Older Children. A Corollary To This Is That They Have No Desire To Change Their Current System. The Children In Question Are Not Allowed Real Free Time, Social, Or Sexual Lives. At The Time Of First True Exploration, An Almost 'Orwellian' ( See Ref. ) Regime Is In Place To Frustrate All Contact, Even To Osculation. Recommend: Intervention prior to these children reaching fourteen
years of age and gaining the protection of The Twenty Guarantees. Should this system persist til then---we will face a revolt that could undo the entire colonial system in The UFP. The Parents Of Deneva Are Not Abusive. But They Labor Under The Delusion That Their Unpaid Laborers Are Always-Happy Ones. They Are Not."

Uhura stared at the damning evidence on the screen. She remembered a debate she had with Carol Marcus about the culpability of those who had not invented a corrupt system, yet who benefited from it and saw no reason to change it. She looked at the boy, now much less angry.

"Peter, I'm sorry. Your parents were human beings, and they screwed up. Can you forgive them? And--maybe me?"

Peter nodded, again fighting the tears.

"I loved them. I loved my baby brother, and I loved taking care of him. The only thing I hated was the way they kept uppping the ante on chores and duties. It never stopped. As for you--well, all grownups assume its the kid who's lying."

That last statement chilled Uhura almost more than anything else. She hoped and prayed it wasn't true. She changed the subject part of the way back again.

"Tell me about Mary."

Peter stared ahead.

"She had it rough. Twins, like I said. A brother and a sister--very loud. Her parents would play with them, lather them up, then hand them back to her. She'd sit and complain about them all, and I'd listen. As dawn approached--usually about 4:30 AM--we'd cheek-dance together."

Uhura shook her head.

"Cheek-dance? I'm afraid you've lost me."

Peter nodded.

"This is strictest confidence, all right?"

"Oh. Absolutely."

Peter still hesitated. As cool and as wonderful as Uhura was, this was a hotly-guarded secret among colonial kids. It was not to be given up lightly.

"All right. No sex, of any kind, because they checked for that. No kissing, even. Some reasons I can't recall. Groping and fondling was out because they checked fingernails. If you were caught, you had to attend counseling--which no one wanted."

Nyota shuddered a little, remembering the parade of counselors her parents sent her to after Tarsus Four. Not for the reason of the Kodos-inspired trauma. For having sex with Jimmy Kirk.

"So this cheek-dance exploited a loophole, I take it?"

"Yeah. You and your partner--Mary, in my case--would turn your backs to one another, and pull down your pants. You then place your buns against one another, and move together. On occasion, one stops and the other grinds their cheeks in between the other's divide. You did this until you were---satisfied. No one checked for this particular odd combination, and since we did our own laundry, no one was ever the wiser."

Uhura fought off her amusement and arousal and asked a question whose answer she mostly already knew.

"What happened to Mary, Peter?"

The boy's face lost all color.

"When I reached the school, a bunch of them weren't wearing anything. Part of the frenzy, I suppose. I noticed that Mary had sprouted breasts and had pubic hair. That was when she threw the knife in my shoulder. That was when I first fired the phaser I held at something other than the Ghid--than the neural parasites. I remember how hot she looked as she became transparent and disappeared forever. I fired from on top of an incline, and took out seven more of them. I think I killed about a hundred people, if you count those who died when the phaser overloaded. I had no regrets--none at all. I was Death, Death On The Streets, and I was damned good at it. I enjoyed it so much, I would have killed ten thousand, given the opportunity. My only regret til I got home was that I hadn't grabbed Mary's breasts before I wiped her away."

"Is that it?"

"Isn't it enough? I am a murderer. I killed without remorse. I was killing people, and all I thought about was sex. What do you call a person like that?"

Nyota, though disturbed, lightly smiled.

"I call him--My Son."

"How can you? How can you welcome a murderer to your family?"

"Because I, too, am a murderer, Peter. Your Uncle and I killed the ten thousand you speak of on Tarsus Four. When we were done, we shot Kodos in the balls, and I took your Uncle by the hand and we enjoyed our first time together not far from the scene of the great massacre. And we enjoyed ourselves so much, that your grandmother punched Jim and nicknamed me 'Princess Hump'. Sex and Death flow together, Peter. Like Water and Salt. Like Blood and Heart. Like Mother And Son. Your challenge--has failed."

"Then--you're my Mother?"

"Seems like."

"What does it mean, though?"

She hugged and squeezed him.

"It means that we each have the other to talk to, about anything we want.  All sins forgiven and forgotten, and all letters exchanged. Add to that the knowledge that life holds for you one certain guarantee---You'll Always Have Me."

Her young heart was asleep, now, so Nyota did what mothers do--she tucked her boy in. She then found it hard to leave him, but the smile on his face said it all. A Dark Corner now knew Light. Her Light. The Light Of A Mother's Love.

Later, Jim Kirk stopped by her cabin.

"Is he set, Nyota? What we find when we confront Tom Sorel about Aurelan's Romulan blood may hurt Peter further."

"He's ready, Jim. He's just too young to have killed a girl he once cared nothing about. That made no sense. I'm sorry."

He kissed her.

"You restored my boy's faith, Nyota. Make all the non-sense you want!"

She took his hand, her exhausted spirit having done all she could for the boy. She had given him a new anchor. Now it was her time. She smiled a predatory smile.

"Jim--howzabout we go dancing---Cheek To Cheek!?"
 

Part Two