Prologue - Hello, Mary Sue.....VERIDIAN III, 2371
After receiving the news, his choice was obvious. Folding time and space as he had been shown, he headed back to Veridian III.
"Captain Kirk! I'll go fetch Soran's remote."
"Good. Because I'd like another crack at that pasty-faced star-killer, Captain Picard."
"Call me Jean-Luc."
While Kirk dodged and weaved Soran's suppressive fire, Picard made his way across a treacherous, collapsing bridge.
"No", the young man pleaded, as he watched helplessly, his physical presence negated by the proximity of The Nexus.
Finally, Picard triumphed, and used the remote to deactivate the cloak surrounding Soran's Trilithium missile.
Then the bridge gave way.
Using a cleverness worthy of both himself and Picard, Kirk sent Soran to his doom. His victory was hopelessly diluted by what he found where Jean-Luc Picard had fallen. The Great Man was dying.
"Jim...did we do it? Did We Make...A Difference?"
Despite Kirk's admonitions, Picard died in his arms. As he did, insulated by time, Wesley Crusher screamed. He had failed his Captain by a lack of time-skill the same way he had failed Josh Albert by not standing up to Locarno. The man his mother loved was dead. The emotions were overwhelming--and they made him sloppy as he vanished. He imagined he would soon be on The Enterprise-E, consoling his mother, who was currently still accusing Kirk, now the E's Captain, for Picard's willful murder. At least he could assure her that wasn't the case.
EARTH, 2063
"You all keep going on about the great Zephram Cochrane! Well, let me tell you something........."
As the legend ranted, Wes felt the wrongness of where he was. The universe, after all, was just one vast vibrational frequency. Each one had a unique feel--and this was not his home. This was doubly confirmed by Picard's voice on a Comm-link.
"Boy, if there's a bigger geek than me in all the multiverse, I'd like to meet him."
"Hello! Wesley Crusher? Gee, I didn't know you came back, too. Its me, Reg Barclay!"
Barclay turned to his friends.
"Hey, look everybody! Wesley's here."
They turned and saw nothing.
"Well, he was here."
"Commander Riker--my cyber-implants are detecting a chronal displacement."
"Geordi--almost everyone here is a time traveller."
"Oh---yeah. I forgot."
USS ENTERPRISE-D, 2366
"Jack, if I happen to be sleeping with Jean-Luc, that's no concern of yours. Our marriage ended years ago--remember?"
Captain Crusher looked at his ex-wife with fury.
"Bev, I can't believe you still hold me responsible for the death of----Wesley?"
They both turned. Beverly smiled.
"Wesley---it Is You! Oh, my boy! You're--"
Wes looked up.
"Not THIS place again."
He vanished, just as XO Picard walked in.
"Have I missed anything?"
USS ENTERPRISE-D, 2370
Worf nodded.
"A...good suggestion, Lieutenant Crusher."
He looked himself over.
"How'd I make Lieutenant?"
Worf shrugged.
"I seem to have my own memory failure of late, Wesley."
The young man snapped his fingers.
"Worf--are you from this reality?"
The Klingon was stunned.
"In truth, No. I am from...."
"Worf, its me. The real Wesley---I got my butt disciplined for the Kolvoord Starburst?"
"Yes! That is how I remember...."
La Forge cut in.
"Wes, you turned Locarno in before..."
As both the reality-travellers vanished, they turned on their old friend.
"Shut Up, Geordi!"
THE WARSHIP ENTERPRISE
"That History Will Remember The Name..."
Wes got up, then and there.
"I am sooooo out of here."
VULCAN, 2285
"Are they gone?"
"Off to Earth, for the signing."
"Peter, will you join me in the hot tub?"
"Gee, I don't know....You Are Just My Ex-Wife, after all."
She pulled him to her.
"T'Pau's decree aside, we are one. Or--we soon will be, if you just get into the sunken tub."
A splash came from the bedroom.
"Are we expecting company?"
"With my luck, it is probably T'Pau."
"Saavik-kam--please don't go there."
But it was not T'Pau, Spock, James Kirk or even King Ghidorah. It was a young man neither had met before.
"Where Am I?"
"You Are In Our Hot Tub. We desire that you should get out of it."
"Could someone help me up?"
Peter did just that.
"And Your Name is...."
"Wesley Crusher. What planet am I on?"
"You Are On Vulcan. Where do you think you are?"
"Not here, that's for sure. What--year is this?"
"Stardate Or Old Earth?"
"Stardate. Nobody uses Old Earth....Oh, boy."
"Well, the Old Earth Date is 2285, if that helps."
Crusher stood up, a trifle stunned.
"2285? Wow, I really lost my way. Okay, I just have to relax. I can wind down my own
vibrational frequency, and get back to my time and place, just like....I'm still here."Saavik had an idea.
"Wesley Crusher....what year are you from?"
"Um....translate...Old Earth....2372."
"Peter? Is it possible?"
"Wesley---I know you're probably bound by the Prime Directive's temporal corollary, but please tell us anything you can about how Ghidorah is defeated."
Crusher shook his head.
"Ghidorah? But The Ancient Destroyer is only a myth."
Again, Saavik made the intuitive leap.
"Peter---he is not from our future."
"Assuming, Saavikkam, that we have one."
"Hey--I didn't catch your names."
She nodded.
"I am Saavik Brianna Kirk, and this is my ex-husband, Peter Claudius Kirk. We possess abilities of our own, and will aid you as best we can to return whence you came."
"This is an alternate reality, then. I had both of you at the Academy, but you weren't married til just after the turn of this century. Hey, did you just say that here, Ghidorah is real?"
"He's...fiction, where you come from?"
"No. But he was never The Ancient Destroyer, except in myth, like I said. The story goes that three of Earth's guardians turned him away. When do you think he'll attack this quadrant?"
Peter looked down, then at the visitor.
"Within the next 5 years. Possibly this upcoming year."
Wes gulped.
"What abilities do you guys possess?"
Saavik answered.
"High-Grade Esper/Psi/TK. I believe we can help you find your center, as you make your jump, as it were."
Peter nodded.
"We can do that part, to be sure. Wesley, will you say hello to my Uncle Jim for me, in your world? Sorry, but he was in your surface thoughts."
"Umm...sure thing. But just why do you two keep the same name, after a divorce? And why do you have such powerful psi?"
Saavik spoke for both of them.
"Our relationship is a long and complicated one, Wesley. Technically, we were related prior to our bonding, which was annulled against our will. As to The Psi-Abilities, in my Peter's case—he is destined to face Ghidorah. My abilities will permit me to stand by his side as he does."
Actually, Saavik was, as always, selling herself far short. But the explanation was mostly accurate. Crusher stood up.
"Shall we begin?"
With each of the two Psi's focusing on Crusher's thoughts of return, they did indeed begin. But time is tricky. Especially in a universe that was mostly dead void, erased by Ghidorah's path, The Line Of Blood.
EARTH, 2272
Peter felt powerful hands throw him against a wall. Everything was a haze.
"How many god-damned drunk tanks do I have to pull you out of? Are you really my brother's son? I have to wonder. Peter, I am Chief Of Starfleet Operations, now. I can't afford this kind of embarrassment. I'm shipping you to an Outer Rim Detox facility. Don't screw this up, or I swear to God, I'll join your brothers and wash my hands of you. Got It?"
Peter never felt a greater shame, in all his life. For he had disappointed his beloved Uncle Jim. His life was a wreck he wished would end. It did.
USS ENTERPRISE, 2282
"Of All The Souls I Have Ever Known, His Was The Most...Human."
Unclear as to what was going on, Saavik looked around. It was a funeral, and Uncle Jim was presiding over it. There was a body in a photon-torpedo casing.
"Spock."
To the astonishment of all, she began to openly weep. Gone was the chance at reconciliation. Gone was the chance to really know him. To say how she really felt, despite his many years of seeming indifference. Spock was dead. She wished her life would end as well. It did.
EARTH, 1991
A young man walked straight up and looked him in the eye.
"I cheered when you left the show. My God, you are the worst Mary Sue character ever made! Just consider yourself lucky that Spiner and Burton were willing to carry you for three years."
A guard of some kind walked up.
"Would you please leave Mister Wheaton alone? You've already been warned once."
Afterwards, a Deanna Troi with no discernible accent walked up.
"I wouldn't put up with them, if I were you. By that I mean the really obnoxious ones. That same little slime actually asked me to sign a nude scan---I Don't Think So!"
Wesley wished this weird life would end. It did---after Stan Lee's appearance in Booth 15.
USS ENTERPRISE, 2266
Peter's dream was coming true, after the tragic death of his family. Life aboard his Father's ship.
"Now that you'll be staying with us, Peter, there's someone I'd like you to meet. This is Mister Spock's daughter---Saavik."
She led him to his quarters.
"You are the Captain's son?"
"Biologically. I didn't know until after my folks died. If Mister Spock is your father, who's your mother?"
"A Romulan Commander who helped him escape from HadesGuard. They were in love, but....she died to let us live."
Peter breathed in, and took a chance.
"Wife?"
She smiled.
"Husband?"
They hugged.
"Oh, Peter! I was so afraid. Reality became....I cannot describe it. I have been Spock's ward, his...wife, and so many other...."
"I know, Saavikkam. I know. I've been a drunk, had two brothers, no brothers, received Jim's body in the company of some French Captain...I'm just glad I have you again."
He held her tighter still.
"Wife--I desire your company."
"And I Yours, Husband. But we have an obstacle there."
She pointed toward the mirror.
"I think that we are only about eight years old. We could play doctor."
Peter just shook his head at a cosmos that seemed to conspire against his happiness. Saavik felt much the same way.
"Peter...our...host?"
He nodded.
"Wesley Crusher Must Die!"
----------------------
Chapter One - Foggy VisionsAUCKLAND PENAL COLONY, ONE YEAR PRIOR TO DEPARTURE OF USS VOYAGER
From inside the meeting area emerged once and future Starfleet Cadet Nick Locarno. He was not a happy man.
"Thanks a lot, God! I come all the way here to gloat over my failure of a cousin's imprisonment, but do I get to gloat? No. Tommy-Gun Paris has a neat little trap set up for me, and I end up looking like a fool. Got anything else up your sleeve?"
He felt a tap on his shoulder.
"Yeah, what do you want...Crusher?"
Wes smiled, froze Locarno in time, and pulled back his fist.
"Nick--you are about to see a Kolvoord Starburst."
Crusher clocked him a good one, and then vanished. Locarno looked up.
"Was that your best shot, God?"
Admiral Paris walked up, frowning.
"Nicholas, I expect this kind of foolishness from my son, not my twin sister's son! When you're through sprawling on the grass, meet me at the transport site."
Some people never learn. After Owen Paris left, a half-conscious Nick spoke one last time.
"Ha! That Was Nothing!"
It then began to rain.
USS ENTERPRISE, 2267
Peter and Saavik circled one another, and then began their wrestling session. Their fathers, Kirk and Spock, watched admiringly.
"Spock, those kids really seem to like each other."
"Indeed, Captain. Their level of affection seems startling. Their friendship has grown almost as rapidly as our own."
McCoy joked with his Captain and First Officer.
"Better send out the wedding invites, gentlemen."
"Doctor, why would we engage in such an endeavor? Even presuming their interest were to blossom into a full biological and psychological relationship, to send out invitations such as you describe would seem both illogical and presumptuous."
Jim saw the two 8-year olds leave.
"I don't know, Spock. The way they get along, and look at each other--Bones may just be on to something, there."
"Indeed, Captain. He is 'on' his Saurian Brandy."
"But Spock, even if that were true, I can get myself sober---and you'll still be Spock."
In a triumph that Spock did not understand, McCoy left.
Using an auxiliary briefing room as their base, Peter and Saavik crunched some numbers.
"Peter, there have been no temporal disturbances reported in this entire region of space—could Wesley Crusher have died?"
"I hope not, darling. That kid is our only ticket back. My Lord, I hate being 8 years old again."
"I do not. Here, Spock is my father, and he pays attention to me. Here, my classmates are all my friends. Here---I have you. Would it be so horrible, growing up together?"
Despite their bodies, and their situation, Peter kissed his wife on the lips.
"No. I mean, this is Paradise. We're aboard The Enterprise as children. No unreasonable chores or duties. Admiralty Hall and Ghidorah don't even exist here. Homework's a breeze--I'm with my Dad. I Love this place. But---I want you. I'm horny, and I don't even have the equipment to be horny with."
She pulled up her shirt.
"YOU lack equipment? Think how I feel. Nary a sprout. I am pushed back to square one with a vengeance. But we are only five years from a reasonably mature age--we can wait."
"Saavik, do you believe that?"
"No. But what choice do we have?"
He nodded, secured the door against casual intrusion, and sat on the table.
"Doctor Saavik---I have a cough."
SHERWOOD FOREST, 12TH CENTURY
"Then you can help me, Q?"
The entity shrugged.
"Merest childs play, Wesley. You must have been really lost, to end up in this little simulation I cooked up. But for a human who has finally transcended his limits, I'm more than happy to help set things right."
Wes breathed a sigh of relief.
"Phew! Great. Cause Peter and Saavik have to get back to their world, too. Get this--in their universe, King Ghidorah is real--and he's called The Ancient Destroyer."
Q's face drained of color at that statement. Something very like fear took over.
"Um--er---sorry, Kid. I have to wash-- have to pay--gotta call--Ok , I Love Ya! Bye-Bye!"
As Wes was pushed on to his next destination, he realized that Ghidorah was somehow so fearsome that even The Q Continuum wanted to avoid him. This lent him no comfort.
USS ENTERPRISE, 2267
"Saavikkam--why did you kick The Lady T'Pring?"
"Father, please just trust me on this one."
"Peter---are you and Saavik--getting along?"
"Sure, Dad. We get along fine."
"Then why do you two always stare at each other like panthers, about to strike?"
He smiled.
"Do we? I--hadn't noticed."
"By the way, kid---kudos on exposing Arne Darvin like that. A Klingon spy on Space Station K-7--imagine."
"Uh--yeah--Imagine."
"And---the way Saavik exposed the Kelvans' scheme before we beamed down--Sulu calls you two The Mary Sue Twins. Y'see, its a term....."
Peter frowned.
"I know what it means, Dad.
"Its late, kids--when are you two coming out of the pool?"
"Soon, Uncle Jim."
"What she said, Dad."
"Suit yourselves."
After Jim left, Saavik quipped.
"If we were wearing suits, that would be a possibility. Peter, are you all right?"
"Saavikkam--I miss your behind!"
"Indeed, husband. I miss the front of your behind."
Then, they heard a splash. Quickly redressing, they saw a young man emerge. Peter was livid, and Saavik was none too pleased, as well.
"Wes---where have you been? We've been stuck in this reality for six months! A mature couple in decidedly immature bodies."
"Sorry, guys. Took me forever to locate you. Shall we go?"
Peter looked at the girl/woman he loved.
"Your call, Saavikkam. Here, you have the relationship with Spock you've always wanted."
She opened her eyes, and Peter saw how beautiful they were at any age.
"Peterkam---above all else, Ghidorah must be destroyed. We cannot run away from who we are. Wesley, take us out of here."
As they left, the personalities of that reality's Peter and Saavik reemerged.
"Hey--there's no one in the swim area."
"Indeed. No one at all."
"Saavik--wanna swim with no suits on?"
"Alright."
The children stripped, and stared at one another in wonder. Peter shook his head.
"Wow! I had no idea Vulcans and Humans were so different!"
SALEM CENTER, NYS, 1997
Sitting in the restaurant, Peter used his telepathy to shield them from onlookers. Wesley was badly confused.
"Oh, man--this is nuts! I can't get a fix on our worlds. Could--Ghidorah be responsible, somehow?"
Saavik shook her head.
"I fail to see how. He is barely sentient."
Peter snapped his fingers.
"The Krenim."
"The Krenim?"
"Yeah, Wes. The Krenim were a race that Ghidorah wiped away in The Delta Quadrant. They used an anti-chroniton particle beam against him. But he incorporates weaponry-energy into his matrix, to ensure that certain things can never affect him again. Time travel within our universe may not be possible, anymore."
Crusher was still confused.
"Pete--how could you possibly know all that?"
"Easy--my mind contains a living record of Ghidorah's atrocities. Its all in my head."
Crusher shuddered at the thought of having such a burden. He got up.
"I'm gonna use what passes for a refresher in this era. Be right back."
While he was gone, a young woman with brown hair walked up.
"Have either of you two seen a guy who calls himself Wesley Crusher?"
Peter froze, and Saavik answered.
"I am...Vicki. This is my husband, Pete. Wes will be...right back. How...do you know him?"
"Easy. He's a time-traveler like you two obviously are. The Professor, he trains us to see past low-grade shields like yours."
"The...Professor?"
"Professor Xavier. You're a Vulcan, aren't you---like Spock? That's cool."
Wes returned.
"Guys, I've got an idea."
The young woman threw her arms around him.
"Oh, Wes! I just knew that was your temporal signature Cerebro detected. Logan owes me a whole case of root beer."
Wes looked at his fellow futurians, who had no more clue than he.
"And You Are......."
"Kitty! Kitty Pryde? We fought Kang together, when The Enterprise-E slipped into this reality?"
"Kitty?"
A voice from behind them--belonging to another Wesley Crusher.
Using the opening, the first Wesley and his two companions vamoosed. Kitty Pryde stared at her actual acquaintance, who shrugged.
"Pesky alternate Crushers."
SEACOUVER, 2004
Walter O'Reilly walked with Methos, disbelieving.
"You--and Cassandra? C'mon, Methos--she's got a serious hate for you--and you kinda deserve
it."The Oldest Immortal nodded in agreement.
"She hasn't forgiven me, Walter--not that I'd trust her if she did. But she says she wants to be free of her hate--that I understand. If it means living with her for awhile, and letting her tear my guts out over what I did, so long ago--then it just might be worth it. To know I had one less person who actively wanted me dead--that is not an unreasonable thing to want, is it?"
The man once known as Radar pushed the big button.
"Do ya think maybe she loves ya?"
Methos face grew angry at this suggestion.
"Walter---a woman does not love her rapist. We may one day be friends, but that is all. I destroyed her, as a Horseman. She may share my house, but not my bed--and I will never have her heart. As I've said before---A Thousand Regrets. A Regret is usually about something you can't take back. Cassandra is definitely on that long list."
"I was just thinkin', though...."
"Boy, shut up and Drop OFF!"
Suddenly, a hole in the fabric of reality opened up and took Walter into it. Methos watched as he vanished.
"Pesky temporal anomalies. We were having a good conversation, too."
M*A*S*H* 4077TH, 1951
Potter stuck his head out of the office.
"Radar, page Majors Burns and Winchester to my office, Pronto! Also, call Tokyo and see when Pierce and Houlihan are getting back from their honeymoon. We're gonna have a push on, soon."
Walter nodded in a daze.
"Uh--sure thing, Sher--Colonel Potter, sir."
As he picked up the mike, Radar stopped and thought about what his CO had said.
"Majors Burns AND Winchester? No way! Charles was Frank's replacement."
Radar then saw a calendar.
"Whoa! Hold The Press. 1951? Sherm wasn't here til 52'--and Hawkeye and Margaret didn't marry til 65!' What next?"
BJ Hunnicutt came in from The OR.
"Radar, did you order the cake?"
"A cake, B--sir?"
"Yeah--a Cake? For Trapper's surprise Birthday Party? Big galoot hasn't even guessed yet."
"I'll get on that, double speed, sir."
"Good. Just tell Frank when you've got it. He's footing the bill for this after all. What a nice guy. Nothing like his pal Winchester."
"Oh yeah, them--they're nothing alike."
As BJ left, another face Radar knew walked in. He was stunned.
"Colonel Blake! What're you doing here?"
Henry shrugged.
"Wellll....Radar...last I checked, Potter hadn't replaced me as Second-In-Command."
As Blake attempted to revive a fainted O'Reilly, three figures hid in shadow.
----------------------
Chapter Two - Danger!4*0*7*7*th, 1951
"My name is Walter O'Reilly--or at least it useta be. Born in the cornfields of Iowa in 1932, I am still alive--and still 20 years old, too. I am Immortal, and cannot be killed cept' for one way I'd just as soon not tell ya bout. For my 72 years, I've been a son, a husband, a cop, and I'd like ta think the best company clerk in the KTO--no offense ta Sparky. Constantly having people come after my----after me, I learned the ropes as best I could, til The Hunters killed Sidney Freedman in 1994. Now I've got a new teacher--Mac, or Duncan Macleod. I was talking to Meth---to a reaaally old Immortal, when a hole opened in the ground, and now here I am."
Father Francis Mulcahy stared in disbelief at the young man he obviously thought was insane.
"Radar--have you discussed this with Sidney Freedman? He is our staff psychologist--and he hasn't died yet."
Walter rolled his eyes at his chaplain's doppleganger, and started to leave in a major huff.
"Francis--I dunno if you're a Prophet in this version 1.6, or whatever--but even a guy who's lost his marbles don't necessarily like being talked down ta. Now, don't you and go and pull any tricks. I said all this under the Confessional - I'm holdin ya to it. None of this, 'but its for his own good' junk. Now, goodbye."
"Radar--wait. Please sit down."
As with almost any other Father Mulcahy, this one had the ability to calm ruffled feathers. Walter did as he was asked.
"Let me try--another tack. If you remember a different history--tell me of it. And know this—the sanctity of the Confessional is absolute. Any 'tricks' I pull are merely to get the individual to speak to someone else--someone who may be able to help them, and who is not bound bysilence."
Walter nodded.
"I'm sorry, Father. But as you can see, I'm all confused. Okay--here it is. We arrived—but Colonel Blake, he's in charge, and BJ and Major Winchester they haven't arrived yet. There are three more doctors, but this place has no records of em', so they're not important ta this. Colonel Blake, he leaves--but he never makes it home. Trapper leaves, and he does. Colonel Potter and BJ come. Major Houlihan, she gets engaged, and then married, but not ta Hawkeye, like she done here--at least not yet. Major Burns loses it, and that's when Major Winchester comes in. I leave, and then everybody does when the war ends in 53'. There's more to it, like Duncan, and Nick Knight, and Godzilla, and Princess Kitana, and the 1701st, and Deep Space Nine, and Samantha
Stephens--but I think I just about covered the main stuff."Francis nodded.
"Walter, this isn't a very nice place. As you leave, consider whether or not you invented all this to cope--now, doing that wouldn't make you crazy at all. In fact---it would make you dam----darned near brilliant!"
As he left to resume his duties, Walter ran into Frank Burns. He was chasing a small Korean child in the compound.
"I'm gonna get you, you little rugrat!"
Before Radar could act, Burns scooped up the squealing child and began--to tickle him. Putting the boy down, Burns received a quick hug, and the boy got a throat lozenge.
"Now, remember to have that AFTER your dinner, then you brush your teeth, okay, pal?"
The child smiled, and ran off. Burns seemed to be fighting back tears.
"They really are the saddest victims of war, aren't they? Maybe this war needs to be fought, Walter. But can mankind find a way not to fight it on their backs?"
Radar would NEVER get used to this version of Frank Burns. Neither would someone who heard his mini-sermon.
"Burnsss....there has always been war, and there will always be war--in war, inn-o-cents tend to die. As long as its kept to acceptable levels, bleeding hearts like yourself and Pierce have ought to complain about."
Though this Winchester was closer in spirit to the one he had known, his manner was even more condescending. Radar then saw a young nurse in full dress uniform cross the compound. She was striking, with a figure that had only recently 'filled' out. She was not unnoticed by two of the camp's resident wolves.
"Hey, kid--that's sure a nice ring your grandmother gave you."
"Thank You, Captain---McIntyre. It certainly is a nice ring that my husband gave me."
Trapper smiled, and backed off a bit embarrassed.
"Sorry, but there's no harm in asking, right?"
"No offense taken, sir."
But if Trapper was satisfied, his companion was not.
"Lieutenant, mind if I see that ring?"
"What are you asking, Captain Hunnicutt?"
"Welll, wedding rings tend to get stuck on. Maybe your husband is no husband, savvy?"
"In fact, relatives forced an annulment on us. But we plan to remarry, soon."
"By soon, you mean tonight? If not, maybe the supply room? You and me, and some finestkind wine?"
"No, thank you sir."
Radar grew alarmed as BJ--of all people--leaned forward and began to harass the young nurse with the odd eyebrows.
"Lieutenant---Kirk? Maybe you aren't hearing me very clearly. I'd like you to have the pleasure of my company tonight. My pleasure--could make your work schedule better--or worse."
The disguised Saavik pulled back her fist, and belted Hunnicutt straight across the compound.
"That would make it--worse, I believe."
Trapper looked at her in awe.
"My husband--gets really jealous. That was for The Captain's own good."
McIntyre saw that BJ was not stirring, just yet.
"Oh, yeah, darlin'. Otherwise, BJ might get hurt."
Saavik made her way to Radar. Their eyes met.
"Um, Captain, Majors--I gotta get with Lieutenant Kirk about something. I'll see yez later."
Burns shook his head.
"Hunnicutt won't."
As the doctors helped their amorous fellow into Post-Op, Radar walked off with Saavik.
"Yer a Vulcan, right?"
"No. I am a Christmas Elf."
"Geez. A Vulcan what jokes and punches. You any relation to Jim Kirk?"
"He is my adoptive father, and blood-father to my husband, Peter. You are a telepath as well?"
"Yeah. Hey, how'd we get here?"
Once they were away from prying eyes, Saavik guided him out of the compound. Peter emerged, and then Wesley. Radar nodded.
"Wesley Crusher. Figures a know-it-all like you would be causin' all this ruckus. Boy, I'll betcha you give the Traveller some kinda fits."
Wes gulped.
"Hi, Captain Mac---er, Walter. How's Father Mulcahy?"
Radar looked up right in his face.
"Him and all The Prophets are doin' just fine, since you left! Sheesh. Now, take us back--and this time no stops in Tokyo, 1954!"
Seeing that the two knew each other, Saavik whispered to her husband.
"Peter--I have studied Earth's 20th Century, and I know you have as well, even more deeply. What happened in Tokyo, Japan, in 1954?"
"Without scanning them, Saavik, I can't say. In our world, next to nothing happened that time and place of any supreme importance. But I have the feeling--something was supposed to. Something to do with King Ghidorah."
Walter and Wesley had finished their argument. Crusher spoke.
"Maybe, this time, with three telepaths in tow, we can focus us back to my world, and then I can contact the Traveller. He'll know how to get you all back."
Walter couldn't resist a good quip.
"That's real good, Wes. Cause you sure don't."
Tempers, as they say, began to flare.
"You know what, Walter? I'm a screw-up. You know how I know that? Because when I screw up, the whole universe is there to remind me of it! And even when the whole universe forgets, there are always my fellow geeks like you and Geordi LaForge to make SURE I can't forget it. So, having reminded me of it all, why don't you back off, before I file you under six feet of dirt, Clerk-Boy?"
Walter's eyes began to spark. As the holder of every Quickening of every Immortal lost without another present, he rivaled Peter and Saavik in terms of raw power. His control over that power was another story.
"Defend yourself, Wus!"
Before they could start in, though, they noticed the glowing eyes of their companions. Their fierce anger dissipated.
"Whoa! Whatd you guys do?"
"Yes. I mean, I didn't feel a telepathic push, or even an empathic touch."
One right after the other, they responded. First Saavik.
"We did not have time to bring you to reason. Your anger was too great. So we fought those fires with two greater ones."
Then Peter.
"Our own anger dwarfs yours. No offense, but when the 'war-stories' are told, we always win."
With that settled, the three telepaths tried to clear Wesley's mind. But they also felt something else.
"Its an evil...an its like Kronos and Caspian put together, oh geez, this is bad."
"I have felt this coldness before, from my own mother, as an infant on Hellguard. But no Romulan schemer was ever this detached."
"Guys..if you're not focused, I don't have a prayer...Where Is Home?"
Peter felt it worst of all.
"An evil....So like Ghidorah's...another Ancient Destroyer?"
The quartet vanished, leaving behind that reality's Walter O'Reilly, more than a little confused.
"Hokay...no more of Klinger's super exxtra-garlicy salami from now on!"
M*A*R*P* VIER, YEAR 19 OF THE LEADER'S NEW ORDER ( 1952 )
Walter saw the buses and trucks, jam-packed with Koreans, all clambering into camp. Hawkeye, or someone who looked like him, rose and spoke.
"My name is Commander Pierce. But you pieces of genetic refuse can call me--God. You won't be staying long, here. As per an agreement reached between Japanese Emperor Hideki Tojo and our own revered President Hitler, you are to be treated to The American Plan. Just ask the Injuns back home all about it--if you can find one. You can't. Not all of you will die--right away. The comelier of your girls will be sterilized and used for the comfort of our hard-working men. The kids---go with Colonel Houlihan. She has nice candy for them--the kind you only eat once. No cavities, that way. To finish, let me welcome you all to the Mobile Army Racial Purifier Nummer Vier. Now, be good and die quickly--or slowly, its all the same to me."
No one had to tell Wesley to try again.
JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA HQ
Ben 'Hawkeye' Kent, aka Superman, called the meeting to order.
"All right folks, here's how it is. Three members of The Legion Of Super-Heroes have shown up on our doorstep. Do we help them or not? I vote Yes."
BJ Hunnicutt, The Green Lantern.
"Sorry, Kal. I promised Peg no more time-jaunts after that Secret War nonsense."
Sherman T. Garrick, The First Flash.
"Seems to me, those future-kids need us, then that's where we go. Kind of our job, last I checked."
Cha'arls Win'ch'tr, The Martian Manhunter.
"Leave us leave Future Matters To--The Future. I vote No."
Princess Margaret, Wonder Woman.
"Lacking a voting majority, Kent--I say we bring them in and hear them out."
"A good idea, Princess. Buy yourself a tiara out of petty cash. Wally, would you show them in?"
Wally O'Reilly, The Third Flash.
"Boy, I sure hope these guys are who I think they are."
The three emerged.
"I am Dragon Lad. This is Chameleon Lass, and Time Boy."
Wesley turned on Peter.
"Wait, wait, wait. How come you get to be a Lad, while I'm a Boy?"
Luckily, at that moment, 'Wally' joined with the other two telepaths and jolted Wesley out. The 'real' Wally stared around.
"Anybody even partways know what's goin on around here?"
"Nope."
"Not I."
"Don't look at me."
"I was going to ask you."
"Damned peculiar."
The Third Flash sat down, dazed.
"Boy, another day in the J*L*A*!"
UNKNOWN
"And now I give you the founder of Mother O'Reilly's Irish Stew Parlors, J.Robespierre O'Reilly! Sir, please say a few words."
"Wes...this ain't even close!"
ALPHA CENTAURI FOUR, 2011
The young woman looked at their four guests.
"Who do you suppose they are?"
The young man shrugged.
"I dunno. But its the first company we've had in a year. The girl is married, but those two guys aren't-a lucky break for you. I'm still not into all that."
She put her hand on his shoulder, and felt him flinch.
"Look, its almost--that time of the month. I'm not going to just leave you hanging. Maybe the girl can be persuaded."
He looked over, fighting back every emotion he felt.
"She's married, all right? One major sin in a lifetime is enough for me, thanks. It--should never have happened."
A bit guilty herself, she took it a bit more calmly.
"There's a lot of things that should never have happened. We shouldn't have had that stupid old man screwing everything up. We shouldn't have been off course. There shouldn't have been cutbacks back home, delaying colonization. They shouldn't have built only three domiciles, spread continents apart. Two for the married couples--and one for us. While they're on top of each other, we've already completed our ten-year development plan! Its Not Fair. We're supposed to be this family of geniuses---couldn't they figure out what happens when you isolate young adults?! It was either do like we did-or go really crazy. Wasn't it? Or are we just plain sick?"
She was beginning to cry, and so he held her in the least romantic way possible.
"First, we denied it. Then, we ignored it. Then, we joked about it. I can't remember what happened between joking about it and--and doing it. Look, I'll explain the situation to her and her husband. I've got to do it at least once and not feel like pond-scum afterwords. And, no, that's not how you make me feel."
She actually smiled.
"I remember the day they brought you home....I felt like the proudest....."
Just then, Peter began to stir.
"Uhhh...What is this place, and what year are we in?"
"You're time travelers?"
"Yes. I'm Peter Kirk, this is my wife Saavik, that's Wesley Crusher and the other guy is Walter O'Reilly. We're kind of lost in time and space."
The man and the woman responded as one.
"We can sympathize."
"Uh, yeah. So, where are we?"
This time, the woman responded while the man fetched some water.
"Well, this is the Earth Colony Alpha Centauri IV, and the way we count time, its 2011."
"Weird. In our world, a man named Zefram Cochrane didn't reach here til 2065."
"In our world, that same man's daughter Lilian was Project Chief at Alpha Control. Well, maybe not the same man. Peter--are you and Saavik happily married?"
"Yes, we are. But that's an awfully personal question---"
"Oh, where are my manners? My name is Penny Robinson. The guy who went to get the water is my brother, Will."
Peter, upon seeing some of their surface thoughts, decided to reign his power in, hard. Despite his knowledge of isolation and its long-term effects, he felt a little ill at what he saw. As Saavik woke up, she caught some of her once and future bondmate's thoughts, and gave commentary as Penny left.
"Ooh, IcK!"
------------------------
I do not, by writing this, mean to make light of what is typically a form of abuse, nor to advocate it in any way, shape or form. The joke is more about a plot-hole in one of everyone's favorite sci-fi shows, and what would happen if it were not addressed. Rest assured, story's end shall see it all somehow made right.