Vulcan, 2284

The young woman sat, ate her bread, and stewed over the day's events. Since she was seven and had first arrived on Vulcan, she had been waiting to find the logical, tolerant place that James, her adoptive father, had told her of. She was still waiting. Again, she heard the voice of T'Pau, and wondered if it would ever leave her head.

"Thy bond was forged in haste. It was forged without consent of thine host-family. It was forged without consent of thine legal adoptive parent. It was forged with an underage offworlder, who has suffered previously from family sundering. Under our law, his rights exceed thine own as a result of this earlier crime against him. Further, this boy is thine own adoptive cousin, so thy bond is incestuous, as well. With Spock, who speakest in this instance for thine adoptive father, I must needs concur in the retrograde dissolution of this untoward bonding. This thing is done, for the good of all. Count thyself fortunate, Saavik Kirk, that no charges of rape shall be brought against thee, for the harm thee did the boy. He plead for leniency on thy behalf."

Up off his knees, Peter Kirk looked at Spock and T'Pau, the two people who had just declared his marriage annulled. He chose his words with a sniper's precision.

"Your decision was based in emotion."

Not even bothering to watch T'Pau's jaw drop, Peter left The Hall Of Judgement, forbidden by law to even glance at the woman he loved. Saavik turned and looked at T'Pau, burning with fury at someone who had always thought of her as somehow unfit.

"I offer challenge."

But Spock shook his head, at this.

"There is no challenge. T'Pau's authority is final, Saavik-kam."

Saavik thought of her first presentation to T'Pau, and the endless repetition of the word 'unfortunate'. She thought of classmates and teachers who were surprisingly non-Vulcan in their treatment of her. And of remarks that were never quite whispered lightly enough. She was a symbol, after all, of Vulcan's shame. A living reminder of the thought that a citizen of Stern Vulcan could be forced by Romulans to bear or sire children against their will. The only person she did not feel that sense of shame around was the man now no longer her husband. Sadly, however much of this feeling was in Saavik's own mind, much more of it was quite real, and always had been. Her rage was understandably great.

"Ambassador, I will thank you to drop the suffix, 'kam', in our future dealings."

"Thee will mind thyself, girl."

"Of course, Lady T'Pau. After all, If I chose not to mind myself, I might find myself minding business not my own."

Saavik let those words and their meaning hang. Doctor McCoy left after her, after a characteristic remark.

"Spock, when I go and shoot my fool's mouth off, and make snide, bigoted, uninformed remarks about Vulcans, you are then supposed to act to prove me wrong. God help those kids, because you proved me right this time. But I don't enjoy being right, Spock. Not one bit."

Finally, only Spock's best friend was left.

"I'm not going to pretend I understand what you did here, Spock. We're still friends-that can't change. But those kids were happy--maybe for the first time in Saavik's entire life. This wasn't the decision we agreed upon."

Spock wished to tell Kirk the truth he could not tell himself. That he wished Saavik were a little girl again, and that he could make up all the lost time. That he could at long last acknowledge Saavik as his own daughter. But the pain of his shame over being forced to sire the girl was coupled with the betrayal by his brother, Sybok, and his own escape, which left the infant behind to be brutalized and raised wild. Spock could have overcome any two of these things. But to deal with all three was beyond even his abilities. So his movements toward Saavik were defined by irrationality and illogic. But for his sanity's sake, he maintained the facade--even in front of Jim Kirk.

"I reconsidered our decision, Captain. Other considerations came to light."

Jim knew what he had to say.

"Stuff your considerations. My son was happy. Out of fairness, Spock, in times past, I let you have authority over Saavik when it came to Vulcan matters. That ends today. Around her, you become vague and—I will say it--emotional. Until you resolve these private matters, I will be forced to remember that you couldn't be bothered to sign the adoption papers necessary to allow her residency on Vulcan. When those two are of age, they may decide to remarry. If that happens, you will have no say in it. None at all."

"Jim, there are things that must be considered, measured one against the other...."

Kirk got in his face.

"The ONLY measure I will use from here on in is whether or not the son of my blood and the daughter of my heart are happy! Do you know that Peter told me he admired you? How well you deal with pain was an inspiration to him. Its a fair bet, Mister Ambassador, that he doesn't think of you as a hero now. As for Saavik? Hell, she worshipped you before today. Go back to Q'onos, Spock. I'll regret some of what I said today, but that's okay. Admiral Pierson once told me that life is simply the winding together of a thousand regrets."

Spock could have told his dearest friend just how far out of line he was in all this. But that would have required the truth. So instead, he re-boarded his private shuttle and worked on a technology transfer treaty involving food replicators.

At Sarek's house, things went as they had for some time. Peter and Saavik shared the same room, and the same bed, and would continue to do so, as far as they were concerned. But their bond ran frighteningly deep, and Peter's mind contained The Line Of Blood, a living record of the misery inflicted by King Ghidorah. Saavik's mind now contained this as well. Peter was now almost used to the dreams. His wife was not.

"I--am the LifeForce Of Ancient Terra. I have three direct children, though all that dwell upon me are called my children. I am those children. I am a whirling, burning disk---no, no, I am a turtle. The world rides upon my back. I am The Champion---I am---Gamera!! Oh, Peter! I know now the burden you bear. To have your life safeguard so much is indescribable. No, wait, I am a dark thing, forged by necessity. Rage and anger have their place, and it is within me. I am Battra, and I exist to brutally correct wrongs. Now---I am beautiful. Husband, is this how you see me? My wings are those--of a butterfly. I am a living rainbow, the Joy Of Life. I am Mosura. I am everything-save that which approaches. What is it? No matter. We shall turn it back, for we are angels, and what could cause us to fall? No enemy has ever been great enough to beat us. This Ghidorah shall be no different."

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Saavik dipped her bread in the herb-laden oil. The herbs were sleep inducers, but they were no help to her. The dream still hadn't left. She wondered if it ever would. Peter had been asleep for an hour and a half, this time. But soon, he would start screaming again. She now understood this. Saavik spoke out loud, reciting her dream.

"I am Gamera, the friend to all newborns and young ones. There is no one who can oppose me. I am The Champion Of Right. But my heart is gone, torn out and eaten by the three-head. How can this be? Good always triumphs over evil. Everyone knows that. I should have fired from a distance. Up close he had me in seconds. Oh, I am slain. My shell empties and I am no more. Mother, I beg forgiveness."

Her eyes blinked, but more memory - dreams darted into her mind.

"I am Battra. I am the laws of life made flesh. Brutal and quick, I am the aphid who eats the leaf, who is then eaten by the spider, eaten by the bird, eaten by the cat, who dies and decomposes, strengthening the leaves the aphids eat. I am the world's anger wearing a suit of life. But for all my anger, I do not hate. The three-head whose gray-head erased me hates. It hates me worst of all, for I am complicated, while he is simple. Red and black all becomes Red. I join the shell-back in death. I am nothing, now."

Her eyes were now glowing. Her new abilities were helping her body to compensate for the strain she felt.

"I am Mosura. On Butterfly's wings, I am every happy moment. Every bit of joy, and reverence. I am beautiful. Or I was. My eggs—my children---how did he find them? Wingless, I know I am the last. Did my wings taste good in the gold-head's mouth? I want them back. I want to be happy, again. I want to fly. I don't want to fall. I am falling. I want my wings back."

At first, Saavik thought certain she had misused her calming meditative techniques. But she hadn't misused or done them incorrectly. They were just ineffective at this level of pain.

"I am no-name. I was created to destroy Ghidorah. But the Angels have fallen, and I yet have no power of my own. The children die quickly. I die slowly. But three-head is wrong. Three-head doesn't know about the rat-thing.  The rat-thing was my child, also. Like the strange ones who lay no eggs, it scurries and builds. It was a freak. I should have devoured it. But now it guarantees my line. It mates with the other rat-things. Their descendants shall be mine, also, and one like a rock shall kill Ghidorah for me. I am no-name, and I am now dead, at the bottom of an infinite gullet."

Saavik again saw the tyrannosaur - stegasaur hybrid, and its freakish mammalian child, now a remote ancestor to all humans. But in some, the hybrid's DNA kicked in with a vengeance. Peter Kirk was this thing's direct descendant. He was the Rock this creature saw. She uttered another phrase, but did not understand it.

"Gorilla---Whale?"

The day had seen the abrupt annulment of her marriage, but for the moment she could live without the title, so long as she and Peter were together. The night had shown her the price of that togetherness, and forced her to wonder if that negated everything else in the onrushing flood of pain from unbidden dreams. As she saw her sleeping love in their room, all thoughts of anger toward T'Pau and Spock and the pain of the dreams left her. Not wishing to wake him, she kissed his forehead. Again, she wondered what sort of person she would be had Vulcan tried just a little bit harder to win her. But it hadn't won her, so someone else had. She whispered to that someone else.

"You, my Angel, are worth every last nightmare."

Climbing into their bed, she knew the next year of reviews of the bond's dissolution would be hard, and put them both to the test. She just no longer doubted that they would survive those tests. Finally, Saavik fell asleep. She fell in deeply enough that she did not hear Peter's mumbling.

"This cannot be allowed. I am a mighty guardian of The Beta Quadrant. This Ghidorah will be destroyed by me and my brothers. I must succeed. I am---an Ultraman........."