(We see Cassandra going for Methos' throat)

Methos: I don't know you!

Cass: He's lying!

(Pushes DM away; They fight)

Richie Ryan: What the hell is going on here?

Cass: Stay out of this, Richie!

Meth: Yes, this is not your fight!

RR: Yeah? Well, I'm makin it mine! Now you two crazy kids make up. Now!

C+M: I'imm I'm sos-sorry.

RR: All righty, then. Methos, you tell Kronos you're in with him. We'll need an inside man.

DM: Can I come, Richie?

RR: No. I don't want you going anywhere near Kronos---understood?

DM: Darn.

RR: (Scoops up Cassandra) You're mine, beautiful!

Cass: Oh, my Lord and Master!

Meth: She used to call me that.

(THE VILLAINS HIDEOUT!!!)

Kronos: NOOO!!! Richie Ryan has returned to town? Blast his heroic hide!!

1983

Kronos: NONE of you kiddies is getting in to see 'Return Of The Jedi'! Luke and Leia are....owwww!!

(Richie kicks Kronos down there)

RR: Out with you, ya dumb creep!

(Throws Kronos out, into the mud)

(Silas and Caspian shake, looking a little like Bulk and Skull)

S+C: Lets get outta here!!!

The Present

Silas: Say, how were we in that? You hadn't found us back then.

Caspian: And just what was that big secret about Luke and Leia?

(Kronos whispers it to him)

Caspian: YUCCKK!! But they kissed and everything.

(The final battle comes and goes, and Richie stands victorious)

RR: Then Its Time For A New Beginning!!!

(He stops; Lowers his sword, and helps Kronos up)

SK: Hi, folks. I'm Stan Kirsch, and I'm an actor.

VP: My name is Valentine Pelka. We did this parody for a reason.

AP: At the end of Season 5, Stan decided to leave the show, with no hard feelings, as demonstrated by his appearance in the final episode.

Tracy Scoggins: Being part of another highly popular, wildly inconsistent syndicated sci-fi show, I can tell you that characters departing is good for the show's health, no matter the pain it causes. Except for that 'John Goodman has been dead for the past year' thing on Roseanne. That sucked.

All: Yeah, yeah, that that was no good.

SK: So, to Clan Denial--let it go. I'll be taking over the lead in 'Footloose' this fall on Broadway, and really can't afford to answer any more e-mail.

William Shatner: Get a Life, Will Ya?

All: Well said!!!

VP: Oh, and in case you're wondering why Silas and Caspian didn't speak up--well, they're not actors, and they really are stupid and crazy.

Silas: Kronos has joined with Ryan!!

Caspian: Traitor!!!

S+C: We Better Get Outta Here!! AAAAHHHHHH!!!!

SK: Yes, they are!