VULCAN, JANUARY 2280  They sleep in each other's rooms so often now, one might think that they would remove the divider between them. It started out Peter's first Christmas here. It almost seemed kind of cute and sweet. By way of adoption, Saavik is his sister, after all.

In August of last year, things changed. The door started closing, and it stayed closed. It was no longer cute and sweet. But Sarek won't hear of stopping them. T'Nia, his great-aunt and a noted healer-- and my friend-- has explicitly told us to allow it to happen. Almost any relationship they have is bound to be healthier by far than what they endured as children.

Saavik was created by a rape and multiple betrayals. The Vulcan raped to create her was my own baby. My son, Spock. The Romulan woman who bore her thought she was master of the universe. Certainly, she was master of this captive Vulcan hybrid, whose body and affections she played with rather cruelly, those long months on The Hellguard. Then came the twist. Her own mother was a woman named T'Rea. She had been Sarek's first wife and an early Romulan spy. Linviaj, her daughter and Spock's oh-so arrogant captor, learned the truth only after Saavik was born. For I am Saavik's grandmother once. Sarek is her grandfather---twice over.

Like all Vulcanoid children of incest, Saavik is stricken by bouts of mental instability. She sometimes hits Peter. This he shrugs off, chiefly because he loves her. Still--what happens when he gets annoyed?

The other day, I spotted a sand-funnel in the distance. Our shields would keep any minor system back, so I just watched the one of the only things on Vulcan that does not hide its raw fury. I spotted something within the sandstorm, using macro-nocs.

Peter Kirk is the son of James, though legally his late brother Sam was listed as Peter's father. Aurelan Sorel Kirk was a half-Romulan, the daughter of a high-ranked Romulan defector who goes by the name Thomas Sorel. She was also what mystics call a Slayer. This all also ties into a Line, which includes both the Kirks and my own family. Its secrets are beyond casual description. My enigmatic half-sister has stated that Peter, our little cousin, contains active reptilian DNA in his medulla oblongata, remnants of a creature called Gojirasaurus.

I remind myself of all this because the sand-funnel I'm observing is not natural. Peter is generating it by force of will alone. He is floating and screaming, and pushing his psychokinesis further and further with each pass. I realize anew that he and Saavik may do anything they like. Because between his power and her contained ferocity, I doubt a starship could keep them apart. Even Jim's.

I love both those kids. But having not the slightest iota of true power over their actions? That scares me.

As I see Peter disperse the sand funnel, I know that I need to act. I may not have any physical authority over two such powerful children. But I will and must exert what moral authority I have.

"Peter! Come here."

He responds, almost confused at the tone of voice I'm taking.

"Lady Amanda?"

Born and bred to duty, like any Kirk. Or is this one more like Jim's late friend, Gary Mitchell? The parabilites seem to say so.     "Peter, what have you and Saavik been doing in your rooms?"

I already know the answer, of course. But how he answers me will say a lot about his true character, and his attitude towards those of us who don't have strange powers. I love this boy. But I won't let him screw my granddaughter in comfort and silence. We may never be able to tell Saavik who we really are to her. Spock almost broke apart on Hellguard, and has pushed so much of it out. His unspoken denial causes Saavik pain. But I will not let that be an excuse for too much, too soon, and too deep emotionally. She's still ours.  ( Writer's note : Since this question has arisen in times past, let me reiterate that this is an AU. In TOS-Canon, Spock was never a prisoner on Hellguard, and could not be Saavik's father. Period. )

Peter's look is that of someone a trifle ashamed. Good. Let him be ashamed, just a bit. He's abused our hospitality.

"We lie together."

Those words I didn't expect. He withdraws to his room, but I feel no closer to the truth. Did he mean 'lie together' Biblically? Did he just try and tell me that they sleep in the same bed, and nothing more? I hope he doesn't think I'm a fool, or addled.

When Saavik comes back from school, my frustration only increases. The same question.

"Mother, we lie together."

She goes to her own room, face tinged with green, disbelieving that I ever asked her such a question. My face is red, disbelieving that she would ever give such an answer. Usually, her honesty is almost painful. She recounted what happened to her on Hellguard in excruciating detail.

*She made Sarek cry.*

But now that Peter is here, she won't tell me anything. Why? Why will she reveal the brutality, and not the glory?

At last, I confront Healer T'Nia, since Sarek has abandoned all authority in this matter to her. I love T'Nia, the great-aunt who actually raised Sarek. But this needs to end. Experiment--over.

"In fact, they are not children."

I sigh, and almost shout back the obvious response to this nonsense.

"Well, they are NOT adults. Not by a longshot!"

Despite her relative emotionalism, T'Nia never seems to be perturbed as often as her older sister. T'Pau was born that way, I'm certain of it.

"They are not adults. They are, in the Terran vernacular, werewolves. Cursed things, who must now lie together for comfort. Only another lycanthrope can hope to survive the carnal bed. Peter and Saavik would kill any other potential mates. Vulcan or Human--or--any other. What occurs there, in that bed, must be none of our concern............"

"Bullshit!"

No, I don't often curse. I feel overusing curse words dilutes their impact. Saving them, on the other hand, for a special occasion raises their impact to nuclear force. The look on T'Nia's face tells me it worked, so I continue.

"You and Sarek are walking away from your responsibilities, as guardian and healer. These are two kids having sex at 16 and 13, respectively. Alright, Saavik is mature--and poor Peter had ten years robbed from him in cryo-stasis. But we as life-guides can't let this just happen, as though they're Adam and Eve in the Garden."

T'Nia now shocks me--by actually smiling.

"Perhaps that is exactly who they are. Who will repopulate the universe, after dread Ghidorah is done?"

Tired of it all, I turn to leave.

"Amanda---do not seek to end the first truly happy period in their lives of abuse and slavery. That will come on its own."

"That, T'Nia---is exactly what I'm afraid of."

Arriving back, I press Peter again, and receive the same answer.

"We lie together."

"Peter--I know I'm not your mother...."

He stuns me with what he says next.

"You're more my mother than Aurelan ever was. I like, trust and admire you. You've never used or hurt me, or played games with my head. I do what you ask, and you are happy with that. I've found a peace here that......"

I have to stop asking him questions, until his tears stop flowing.

"I never knew...."

Then, my own start. They're going to keep making this difficult.

It was odd that I hadn't noticed right away. Saavik wasn't sixteen anymore, of course. But Peter was still thirteen. The same age as when we took him in, two years ago.

It was the cryo-stasis. Its far from a precise science. Its less so when you pump genetic garbage cocktails into a prisoner you don't give a damn about. The Hall will pay. Especially that monster, Admiral Bunson.

In early June, he began to twitch horribly. Peter wasn't one to feel much pain, and he was even less inclined to admit it.

"s-ss-Sssaaavvvikkaaa--mmm!!!"

He had spent a grueling seven weeks in the Noonday Forge--our little version of Hell's seventh pit---practicing telepathic and psycho-kinetic control. Now, I thought, he's paying the price. I was wrong, though. His musculature was close to bursting through his skin, as he ran back outside.

If I had thought the sand funnel impressive, or perhaps frightening, that was nothing. Now, Peter's hair began to spike out, and--and glow golden. His eyes went from brown to green in a heartbeat. Vulcan--the planet itself--began to quake around him as he screamed. Lightning and clouds formed above us. Heaven help this world if we ever have to handle a real rainstorm.

Just when it seemed that his poor body was to be consumed by this energy, she was there. My Saavik drew away that energy, saving her man and fainting in the process. Neither she nor Peter would remember a thing. But I would. In times to come, this power would re-emerge, in both of them.

"They're just lying together."

Soreth, T'Nia's son, checked on them both. Saavik was fine. Peter--well, he had changed.

"This is not an unexpected effect of cryo-stasis. Happily, it is contained quite easily. Be well, Cousin Amanda."

The 13-year old boy was gone. In his place stood an 18-year old man, now looking more than ever like his forebears. Still a trifle skinny, though not as much. He was normal, now, except that he had never been normal. Neither of them had. I walked in on them kissing.

"Stop! We have to talk. Right here, right now. How far has this gone? No cute answers--I want details."

Actually, I want to run and pretend I never saw this. But that won't help them. Saavik bids him sit down. They both look so scared. But I would never hurt them.

"Mother---we have made attempts to couple, as it were. Those attempts met with failure."

Failure? Either these two have set a very high standard for success, or they're claiming not to know what every teen from Abelard and Heloise on down knew all too well. Now, Peter looks---horrible.

"We--try. We play. That goes alright. But as for, ya know--going all the way---"

His voice breaks.

"I can't."

Saavik is quick to respond.

"WE can't, Peter-kam. It is after all, both of us."

"Kids--I'm confused. What precisely does and doesn't happen?"

He can't speak. This--situation can eat a young man's ego alive and whole. I can sympathize.

"Mother--we are functional, until we attempt to mate in any way that involves---"

She's almost wholly green, now.

"Vaginaloranalpenetration. Then, Peter grows impotent--or I become frigid. Or both. It is a source of immense frustration and shame. T'Nia and Soreth have indicated that our---childhood experiences have given us a psycho-somatic reaction that is not easily undone."

I leave them, then. They deserve to be alone together. I hear them speak, and cannot tell which is which.

A tearful voice.

"I want to make you happy."

A supportive one.

"You always have."

The next day, I am back, speaking to T'Nia, but now armed with more information than I had--or wished to have.

"Saavik was treated abominably on a world where she was the lowest creature on a world full of low creatures. Peter was a manservant to lazy parents, and made to serve as a parent, as well. They both killed before age three. Then, the violations came. Children, used in such a manner, often become scared of the act itself. This will pass."

She sounds confident of that. But God Almighty, what happens when they pass that block? Will they then unleash that pent-up abuse upon one another?

God bless the children. For they abide and endure.