Andrew Unknown
by Rob Morris

Willow was very skeptical of his request.

"Andrew, past life regression is for people with solvable problems."

The remaining member of the Troika stood firm.

"Buffy called me for the dog who's always begging for Snausages in the commercial. I just want to find out if I ever had something going for me."

Buffy shrugged.

"Okay, I apologize. That dog is way cooler than you."

Xander brought up an obvious point.

"You may think you were Napoleon, or somesuch. But dude--you were probably like Agnar The Piss-Boy or like that. Just let it go."

But Andrew was adamant, so the regression began til a pivotal life was found. Willow tried to speak with the past life-being.

"What do you do?"

"I--look for something."

"What are you looking for?"

"What is mine. A thief stole it. It was very valuable."

"How valuable are we talking?"

Andrew's eyes opened, looking for all the world like sickly green lamps. His teeth seemed pulled back and serrated. He was now actually scary.

"Pre--eeee--cioussss."